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|ADVICE ZONE: True Love Crippled By Outcast Brouhaha! Do I Still Marry Him? by starz: 12:57 am On July 19, 2017|
Complements Kisha and thumbs up for your hard work and good heart. My life’s wish is to get to finally meet you someday. You inspire me a whole lot, and it’s my prayer that your water keeps boiling. Please don’t include my email. Thanks
I have an issue and I don’t know if it’s a chronicle or not, please feel free to decide which one it is.
My story:I have been dating my first love in Dec. 26 2001,i had just finished secondary School, I was young then so there was no sex involved (I only wanted to play the hide and seek). At first he was annoying but we kept growing up. We have been together for seventeen years now (we had sex in December 2014 for the first time). He proposed, not that he was waiting for the sex to happen though. We reside in different states. I went back to my base while we made plans for marriage by Easter 2015. I sent him to my house for the marriage talks (you know the dates and all).
He got the dates to choose from and my family is supposed to also confirm the date vacant so that we can fix our marriage ceremony, at least the opening part. But my family started stalling I called to find out why the were developing cold feet and my dad evaded answering me and said I should ask mum. I called and asked and she gave me not just a disappointing answer but a shocker (coming from her) “his family are osu”. But she said we will talk about it when I get back for Easter 2015.
A meeting was called when I got back and my dad again couldn’t pick a stand instead he asked my brothers to decide and they all said a heart breaking no. The robbed me of my sleep several nights cos all I did was pray and cry until there was no tears again left. My sister accused me of being selfish, trying to marry and making sure others get stuck at home. I couldn’t believe that such issue could ever be said in my house.
There was anarchy at home caused by me, then I threatened to disappear from the house and never to return (I thought they will be moved but it failed). All these times they seem to have forgotten they robbed me but I haven’t. I love him because he convinced me of true love and I can’t seem to let go.
I am considering two options either to stay single or to leave the country. I told him we could leave the country and I am willing to do that but he says he does not have money but still I am willing to wait forever until we are able to be together outside this country and far away from home. And if I succeed in leaving I don’t think I am ever coming back.
I cannot throw away everything we had just because of what I don’t believe in. And I am loosing my sanity. I also don’t want to treat them the way they have treated me. But I have developed a great dislike for Africa for this (I’m sorry to sound like this) Please Kisha use your red pen for me and bvs I need your one cent on this. I will be reading all comments please.
*This is really really really heart breaking….My dear do not blame your family,blame the society and the traidition that refuses to go away! Should i tell you the truth?Whether you relocate or not,if you marry an OSU,it will affect your immediate siblings and no one will want to come an inch near them…
If you relocate to the end of the world, your offsprings will also get the same treatment of rejection cos your spouse is OSU,unless they will never go near any Nigerian person…even as friends,they will be pushed to the background and receive same treatment. Please be wise before you make any choice and realise that sometimes love is not enough…If you decide to go ahead and marry that man,even the generation of your Childrens children will blame you when they cry bitter tears of rejection.
I am sorry but i will advise you not to do it..I advise from what i see my friends go thru becos their parents married for love and robbed them of being classified as normal… This subject is so annoying!
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